Well, Sam has officially come down with something. He’s been fighting something for a few weeks, but seemed to be doing it on his own, for the most part. I guess not. We are only nine days away from surgery. Unless he gets better quickly, they will likely cancel surgery. Please pray he can fight this off without going to the hospital. Thankfully he’s not on oxygen, but we are bordering having to start.

I recalled a post I wrote almost exactly a year ago. I changed a few things, but the feelings haven’t changed much…

Unfortunately, fear creeps in pretty quickly with Sam when he gets a fever. When my other three kids were little and they spiked a fever, fear wasn’t even a thought for me. Usually with a little TLC and some ibuprofen, or maybe a quick trip to the clinic to get them on an antibiotic, they were fine eventually. Sam is a whole other story.

It’s not just a fever for Sam. It’s even closer monitoring than we already do. It’s keeping an extra close eye on his sats and heart rate. It’s adding several more nebulizer treatments throughout the day. It’s canceling plans, again. It’s doing everything we can to keep him out of the hospital, but doing that can be scary too. It’s hoping whatever doctors are on call know Sam and his story. Thankfully, most of them do. It’s double checking the oxygen tank and Ambu bag. It’s not wanting his nurse to leave at 7:00. It’s staying up most of the night on high alert. It’s praying earnestly for God to heal whatever is going on with Sam and to calm my nerves. It’s praying God will help us remember all we learned during our Tracheostomy and Infant CPR class so long ago in the hospital, in case things go south. It’s so much more, but overall, it’s faith over fear.